The Pessimist

I am a pessimist. I mean the “I don't comb my hair” kind, what is the the point really?
Not the sort of person who brightens up parties just by “being there”, if you know what I mean.
Quite the contrary actually.
So this came as a real surprise, an invitation, to a real party, well that was a first. The folks throwing the party must be real optimists, the half-full glass kind, I guess.
Now the way I looked at it, I would have rather turned up at a funeral for all the fun that I might have, but then I thought, lets give the poor fellow a chance, turn up, after all God Himself said Do A SINGLE good deed and I'll forgive ALL your SINS, or something like that, but that's not the point really.
There was a time I remember when I wouldn't bother to return greetings, what's the point really in useless social rituals?
I should have been a vampire that would have kept people off, but I listened to Classical Rock which is like the second best thing, though you don't really get to change into a bat(that would have been sorta cool though), but people really avoid you, so I am almost there, I have been trying to get bitten but turns out most bats don't give a damn about my blood...
Anyways back to the party... there was no point in turning up or even getting dressed... but then there was no point in getting out of the bed also...
So I turned up there, then I noticed something, other people had packages in their hands, wtf anyways I remembered that it was a b'day party, so I needed a b'day gift damn that was outrageous if I had only known. The nerve of them, not only they expect me to turn up, they expect gifts as well. Now had I been blessed with brains this would be the point where I would return back home and try to get some sleep, not really sleep being the insomniac that I am...
Anyways whatever human interaction virus I had caught was pretty strong so I thought I would get a gift, hand it over and run like hell... that was the plan anyways...
Now I almost reached the Gift-Shop almost without any major accident. So I was crossing this dark lane when I hear Help!!! and there's this incredibly beautiful girl being robbed, so I was no Superman and the robber seemed to be one, so it was a no-brainer, her knight in shimmering armor would arrive soon enough, so on the balance there was no reason to get Karma on my own two hands, especially considering the number of cups I had broken, finally I had to buy steel cups.. but they always leak and a coffee isn't the same in them...
But that is again not the point... so I let Karma happen and went to the Gift-Shop.
When I returned outside, I saw the Girl was standing there waiting for someone. Ever so incredibly she had suddenly started moving towards me... well at least in the same general direction as I was, so on instinct I turned left and she followed so anyways, I turned again and again in the narrow by lanes but she struck on like Dahaka. Now on my day I have even defeated the Dahaka, but today I neither had the Water Sword nor did I even have my analog stick, so I was pretty much screwed, finally by a twist of fate( I have heard that there are writers, of flesh and blood who actually use this phrase, how lame!!!) I was standing at the very same spot as the girl was while being robbed... I had meddled with Karma by not touching it.....
So anyways she caught up with me pretty soon.
I don't have a lot of money but I do have this present its anyways for people I don't really give a damn about... please take it lemme go and I would never ever go to a party. Hell I'd get a proxy for my marriage.
So the girl asks me Why didn't you help me? I mean okay so I am a boy so does that mean every time a girl screws up I rush to her aid? If you're thinking so then Surely You're Mistaken... Nevermind.
So when was it last when you combed your hair? She asked me suddenly. Well yesterday. I mean there was a day such that I had combed my hair yesterday...
So you don't meddle with Karma? That a philosophy of your life? Well actually the philosophy of my life is I don't give a damn...
Why are your eyes so soggy and your skin looks bleached? Well obviously its been a month since I last saw the sun what less do you expect?
Why are you not out in the sun? Well obviously because its damn too hot? In October? Well it was hot a month ago, and with all that Global Warming... who knows??
So we chatted for some bit anyways I remembered the party and the 499.95 present in my hand. What is it? She asked me. Its a video-game. Who are you giving this to? A classmate.
So tell me, what kinda music you listen to? I don't. Hey why are you so defensive, unless you listen to dash-dash-dash( what if i get a defamation suit). Well here it goes, I thought, I listen to classical rock, like Bob Dylan. But ain't he folk rock? Well I mean the whole period I listen from Dylan to the Who...Hang on you know Dylan! Well I listen to him sometimes... I couldn't believe me ears... and Beatles yeah sure... Clapton? do... Dire Straits... intermittently. Floyd... mostly. Barrett( this was too much to hope for but I did ask and held my breath) all the time.... was it a dream. It felt so real... I could see the sun it must be a dream. So well I thought lets go with the flow... So I asked her what do you do when you're not listening to music.. video games.. FPS to MMORPGs'... at this point I thought a girl who listens to Barrett and plays Rise of Nations and F.E.A.R..... do you even exist I asked her and touched well she seemed solid, okay so she was soft and all.... but damn it was no dream at all it reality at its best....
So years later we were getting married and I finally asked her.. Why did you approach me that day anyways? Well she said... I read somewhere that God Himself said Do A SINGLE good deed and I'll REPAY you for it... or something like that but that is not really the point......
SO okay I totally made up that last part... I bought the game and decided I don't give a damn anyways so I went back to my den and hooked up the game... about that girl I don't really know, maybe her knight showed maybe he didn't depends upon the way you look at it...